The Sweet and LOWV Down News Hour:LOWVing the Bubble

Put up your hair and slide into a steaming hot tub of the Sweet and LOWV Down. This week's epic show finds your hosts breaking down the updated rotisserie standings and statistics in the LOWV THISS report.  

Got two hours? This epic podcast is the finest LOWV talk you'll find until Mike Jones finishes up his stint as the court appointed mediator in the NFL labor dispute. 


As always, if you're pressed for time, just skip ahead to listen to these  aural masseuses work out the knots surrounding your team and give us a shout with your complaints and corrections.

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The Sweet and LOWV Down News Hour:This Tweet is R-Rated

Skate on out onto a frozen pond of knowledge with another installment of the Sweet and LOWV Down. To start this week's truly epic show, your correspondents first expose their ignorance of everything NHL; discuss the Red Hot Sox; breakdown ESPN's "Franchise Player" draft; re-tweet Lo-Mo's latest words of wisdom; sing the ballad of Rich Hill; investigate the open field hit on Buster Posey; and ponder a beer with Wilpon.

Your rambling hosts then turn their attention to the LOWV, discussing eight dramatic matchups from the last three weeks: General Bobby "Lee" Wall's valiant charge into LM's breach; the death of a season, a play by LU, starring DLBP; unB's crimes against the scheduling gods, their wrath is named Equipe; Snatty's late run nearly catches BB flat footed; ascendant BI pitches past DLBP; VR feasts on Guap's children; Flash drops Ship's anchor; and the distant drumbeat of FC's march to glory terrifies Rome and the LM.

Got two hours? This epic podcast is the finest LOWV talk you'll find until Mike Jones returns from leading his Dothraki horsemen over the Narrow Sea and has reclaimed the throne for his Targaryen bride. As always, if you're pressed for time, just skip ahead to listen to these backstabbing eunuchs and whoremongers besmirch your bannermen and send us a raven with your complaints and corrections.

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LOWV THISS Report Published

NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- This afternoon, The Heidegger Institute of Sports Science published its much anticipated first quarter report on the 2011 League of Women Voters season. The report analyzed the statistical output of the 14 teams, their hypothetical standings in a rotisserie format, and the return on investment for players signed in the 2011 auction. Earlier this week, the LOWV THISS Report was leaked to the Sweet and LOWV Down News Hour, which discussed the results in their May 9, 2011 broadcast.

The Sweet and LOWV Down News Hour:You're Gonna LOWV THISS

Break out your listening trunks and dive into the deep end of the Sweet and LOWV Down. To start this week's epic show, your correspondents first discuss the unpredictable start to the MLB season; investigate Bobby Bonilla's pension plan; show Gloria Allred where the bad man put his bat; voice a new verse to the ballad of Lenny Dykstra; and update the hottest bats and arms races.

Your humble hosts then turn their attention to the LOWV, discussing each matchup from the last week of action: unB collects another trophy; Flash cuts off LM mid-funk; BB races past FC; ERdR and VR chalk up DLBP and Ship; BI sublets the ASL cellar to LU; and Snatty splits Guap's arrow.

Finally, the LOWV Down provides an exclusive sneak preview of the upcoming first quarter statistical report by The Heidegger Institute of Sports Sciene (LOWV THISS) and discuss the oft- surprising rotisserie standings and the implications of imbalanced schedules. You won't want to miss this, as the reporters learn how drastically the statistical standings vary from the current standings.

Got two hours? This epic podcast is the finest LOWV talk you'll find until Mike Jones returns from Lenny Dykstra's scrap metal yard. As always, if you're pressed for time, just skip ahead to listen to these know-nothings sick the war dogs on you, toss that human shield aside and send us a video response from your walled compound.


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The Sweet and LOWV Down News Hour: Intervention in Dodgertown

It's that time again, so sit back and and soak in the Sweet and LOWV Down. This week, the dastardly duo breaks down the last few weeks of baseball: Selig declares martial law in Dodgertown; Mets are asked to SAC up; Bonds raises OBP with free pass; Braun gets rich and weepy; another Red Sox championship tainted; and updates on the hottest bats and arms races.

The hosts then turn their attention to the LOWV, discussing each matchup from the last week of action: LU learns that fortune favors the bold; Flash reacquaints self with earth; it's no rumor, VR is back; unB tests the limits of offensive futility; FC shows Guap where he can put his slider; short-armed BB squeaks by BI; DLBP and Ship lose beauty contest; PMF subprime bubble continues to swell; and Snatty gets an intervention.

Got an hour? This is the finest LOWV talk you'll find until Mike Jones gets back from the candlelight vigil in honor of Ryan Braun's contract extension. As always, if you're pressed for time, just skip ahead to listen to us besmirch you, uncork your slouch and write us a wingeing email.

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